And….it’s over

The semester is finally almost over. Looking back it really feels like it went by so fast and that it’s surreal to think I only have one more semester until I graduate. Yes, i also completely feel the “senioritis” at full blast, i have had no motivation to do anything school related lately. I think another reason i have no motivaion is because i have 10 more days until i’ll be flying to egypt for three weeks during our winter break. I am so excited, i haven’t been to Egypt in around three years, so seeing all my cousins and family members who have either recently gotten married, or had kids, etc should be a lot of fun. The only thing i’m not looking forward to is going to Egypt alone, because Lord know i might come back married if it was up to all my fanily and they are just so pushy. I’m sure my mom wouldn’t mind but it’s definitely not going to happen! Anyways, this class was really a lot of fun, and i was just thinking about how much i was going to miss the people. It’s been interesting! See you next semester in your Senior Seminar class!

VOCAB:

Muse

n: to be in the state of deep thought/ a source of inspiration

eregrinate

v: to travel over something/ to walk especially on foot

IT’S OVER

So last Saturday was my brother’s wedding, and it’s finally over. I have to say though, that not just because it was my brother’s wedding, but it was seriously one of the most beautiful and fun wedding i’ve ever been too. I loved the fact that my sister in law wanted to incorporate so many traditional afghan components, like a traditional afghan dance performed by myself, my other two sister in laws, her cousin and her cousins niece, and one of our mutual friends. There was also a mirror ceremony in which a large cloth is to be put over the bride and grooms head, while someone holds up a mirror in front of them and they then read a few versus from the quran together. They also did a traditional henna ceremony where my mom and dad put henna on their hands which was supposed to bring them good luck. The groomsmen performed a traditional palestinian dance called a “debke”, which was also a lot of fun to watch. Walking in there was a “zeffa” group which played traditional egyptian music while they walked into the hall. All in all, it was such an amazing experience and such a fun night that i already kind of miss it, which is kind of crazy for as much as i complained about how crazy hard it was to get ready for it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGVYjaoZ9n0&feature=share

There’s a link to the video if you really want to see our 10 minute long traditional afghan dance, im the one in the royal blue dress and silver scarf=]

Vocab words that are related to the wedding

Henna:
The powdered leaves of a tropical shrub, used as a dye to color the hair and decorate the body

Zeffa:
(Pronounced "ZEFF uh".) This term is often used to refer to an Arabic wedding procession. The newly married couple is led into the reception hall in a formal procession to acknowledge their new status. A zeffa frequently is led by a belly dancer. ..

Blog, week 12?

How long do these blogs even really have to be? These are kind of getting to be a bit of a drag. Which is why again im writing this at 11:50 pm. I’m actually painting my nails, trying to study for an online quiz im going to take after this, and chatting with my cousin in New York online. The wedding is literally around the corner, i can’t believe it’s this close. As much as i complain about it now, i’m going to be so sad when its over. It’s crazy that we’ve been planning this for so long and now the moment is finally here, i can’t wait and hope everything goes perfect. Another thing that i hope goes well is all my visiting family gets along. My moms brother and my dads brother are both flying in and will both be staying at our house. My dad doesnt get along with my moms brother at all, and my moms brother doesn’t really like my dads brother, so really all this dislike might be interesting. I’m excited to see my uncles nonetheless! Okay, end of post because i’ve got lots to do( yes that was horrible english i know!)


Words 1. murked- To be badly defeated at something.

2. snooks plural of snook
Noun:
A large edible game fish (Centropomus undecimalis, family Centropomidae) of the Caribbean that is sometimes found in brackish water.

Blog number "I haven't been keeping track"

It's 11:40, and I just remembered about my blog post. I'm writing this from my cell phone because my Internet is not working at my house, but the 3G network on my phone is. It's times like these I like technology. Again I have no idea what I'm going to write about. I guess I can write about how I still don't know if I'll
be able to go to Egypt in the winter which I was really looking forward to, buy I just really don't want to go if my moms not there. I guess well just have to find out. I know we have all(my entire family) been stressed like hell abouy my brothers upcoming wedding
which I can't believe is less than a month away. I guess it's true that when everyone tells you weddings are expensive and stressful, you should believe them, but you can't really feel it unless you're going through the process yourself. Whether its dress fittings, cake testing, meeting with party planners, dance practice, figuring out bridesmaids, planning bridal
showers, the list seems like its never ending. At the same time, one of my other really good friends that I've mentioned before is getting married soon, so I'm also planning her bridal
shower , but my sister in law keeps talking about how I'm planning such an amazing bridal shower or my friend and I'm not spending as much time planning hers. I guess you can't please everyone!


obscurantism
[uhb-SKYOORr-uhn-tiz-uhm]

Definition:   opposition to the increase and spread of knowledge.
-noun

1. Opposition to the increase and spread of knowledge.

2. Deliberate obscurity or evasion of clarity.


Samlet- is defined as a young salmon.

Aeloist- a pompus windy bore who pretends to have inspiration

Autolatry- the worship of one’s self.

Okay now i really dont know what to talk about for this blog, my back and neck hurt and im starting to get a cramp in my left hand from typing. I need to go take a shower and catch up on a whole lot of reading. All i want to do is….go to sleep. As usual, nothing new there. I’m reallysttarting to want to go on a vvacation more and more every day and im starting to really consider going to egypt in december. I mean i was originaly supposed to go with my mom but she si kinda bailing on me, and everyone there is trying to get me married so i really don’t want to go without her. That’s one trip i definitely need my mommy for. She is the one who is telling everyone i want to get married which i dont, so everyone is so excited about finding me someone. So annoying, okay seriosuly i really have nothing else to write about, so hope this is long enough!

Here are my TWO vocab words;
Abacinate- to blind by putting a hot copper basin near someone’s eyes.

Abderian- given to incesstant or idiotic laughter

I truthfully have no motivation to write this blog right now, all i want to do is go to bed becuase surprise surprise…i’m exhausted. Working 12 hour days and then coming home to dance practice for my brothers wedding, and then having to do homework is insanity. I need a vacation, plus being a senior on top of all that, senioritis is starting to take place and i am very nervous. Where can i get myself some motivation? I would say im looking forward to the weekend, but really it’s going to be just as hectic and crazy or even more so than the weekdays. Tomorrow at my work is our halloween party. Now i have work at 6am, just imagine how much energy i’ll have to deal with 45 children under the age of 5 all sugared up running around like crazy looneys! I can’t wait! Hahah. Between that time i have a meeting to go to at a hotel for my firends bridal shower, which i have to run to and run back to work. Then after the insane day im goin got have at work tomorrow because i already know its going to literally be INSANE, i have to go with my sister in law to meet with her DJ to discuss her music for her bridal shower. Then i have to go with my friend to find shoes for the on of the bridal showers i am helping to throw for my friend Sarah who is getting married in egypt in december. Hopefully stores will still be open at that time. Saturday i have to be at my friends house at 8am to help set up for one of 2 bridal showers im throwing for my friend, then after that i have another party to go to at night. Sunday i have dance practice in hayward from 10 - 3pm which is going to be intense. Then i have to go shopping for the rest of the things i need for the bridal shower number 2. Somehow i need to catch up on all my work over the weekend as well, sounds like a ball of fun or what? Yay, im gonna go write another blog no wto make up for the one i forgot and didnt feel like doing last week.

Birthday..ughhh

Okay again before i forget, here’s my word of the week. The word is, widdershins, which is an adverb defined as : in a left-handed, wrong, or contrary direction : counterclockwise. Hmmm…interesting?

Okay, anyways now onto more about me and my exciting life. More anxiety, panic attacks, and stress is still an everyday occurance. At this point why am i not immune to it? Along with wedding planning, bridal showers, and more weddings, my birthday is on Sunday. I’m turning 20, and i am not very happy about this. I know everyone keeps saying im still young and i should be enjoying this time, but really it’s kind of scary. This is the decade im supposed to finish school, get married, start a career, and start having kids. AHHH! That just sounds like too much, and at this point, even though im only 20 my parents have started the pressure about me getting married soon. It’s so annoying to have to listen to them talk about potential husbands, but at the same time they have always told me to wait until i finish school. However i graduate in the summer, so then what? I am thinking of taking a year off to find work, but only because i have had absolutley NO time to study for the GRE’s and this will give me more time. I just hate deciding everything for the rest of my life. I feel so pressured, and it’s like theres no room for mistakes. Am i just overthinking this all a little too much?

I think a therapy session might be in need very soon. Another thing i need to vent about is the fact that i HATE planning stuff for my bdays because its just annoying. BUT, none of my other family or friends plan anything. I am always the one to plan their birthdays, weddings, bridal showers, baby showers, whatever. So even though i said i wanted to do something, but not have to plan… no one ended up planning anything. A little annoying? Yes. [I know you hate rhetorical questions, but it makes my rant look better, okay?]

Since i’m just venting here, i also hate the fact that i have work at 6 am M-F for the next three weeks. It’s only wednesday an im exhausted. I don’t know if ill be able to last much longer, here’s hoping!

There’s just something about this weather...

Since i always forget about incorporating my word of the day, i’m going to start off with that. My word is, “coruscate”. The word is a verb which is defined as the following… "to give off or reflect light in bright beams or flashes” OR "to be brilliant or showy in technique or style”. I’ve never heard of the word, but it seems as though it could be a word that i would use in my everyday vocabulary.

I guess in today’s blog i’ll talk about the fact that i have so much work to do, yet again. I also can’t seem to find enough hours within the day to complete all that i have to. So i’m currently at Starbucks trying to study and get this in before i have to go to work in an hour. After i get off at 6, my sister in law is making me go with her to look at her wedding dress that just came in and then were all invited to go over to dinner at her dads house, which is in Fremont. We all have to go because he gets very offended when any of us don’t show up, even though he knows we all work and have busy schedules, and it’s especially hard to make it out during the week. So, i’m just going to have to sleep less and work more. Seems to be the motto to my life a this point in time. This past week i haven’t been able to go to sleep before 3am, because of all the work i have to get done. Then i have to wake up at 7am for school. Somehow i have been able to function, but as i may have stated before, i am the type of person to get stressed out about the smallest things so, being stressed along with no sleep, which leads to a lack of appetite, leads to a horrible immune system, and i end up continually getting sick. I haven’t gotten sick in a while, and i’m praying it lasts. I have started to get a little cough though, and i’m just hoping it doesn’t turn into anything worse. Even though i don’t get sick often, when i do, it is not pretty. I’ve gotten strep throat at least 3 times last year, and then i got bronchitis. Haven’t gotten sick badly this year, but the cold weather is just starting so i guess i shouldn’t speak too soon.

So anyways, i’m at starbucks trying to get some work done, which probably was not such a good idea. Everyone here just wants to talk and i don’t want to be rude, so i have to talk to all the employees because i come here on a daily basis and they all know me pretty well. Here’s all the stuff i was supposed to get done in the hour im going to be here. I’m supposed to complete this blog, write a one page proposal for my public policy class, respond to discussions for my online Communications class, study for a quiz in that class, and think more about my topic for our 100W class. I’ve been here for about half an hour, and i’m just finishing my blog. I would say i haven’t been all that productive.

I really don’t want to go to work in a while either. We are still in the process of hiring new teachers, and really the people that have come in so far are horrible and could never be trusted to work with children. The people that have came in are either too old with no energy, to prissy to be able to work with kids because they don’t want to get bugers on them. It’s been pretty hard to look for people but there is one lady that could possibly be our new teacher. She’s young and full of energy, but she still kind of a brat. Hopefully the attitude goes away, and she fits in to the little family we have created at our daycare. Okay, on to the next project.

Help is on the way!

I really have nothing new to write in this post, so I’m just going to keep complaining about how stressed out I am with work and school. Today, it hit a whole other level. Well, actually last night. Our school director has been working very hard the last couple months with all the craziness going on, and I definitely can’t complain. Yesterday however, her son broke his leg and since she doesn’t have insurance she had to take him to the emergency room at Valley Medical. Like I had previously said, she is a bit on the frantic, dramatic, very exaggerative type so I could only imagine all the stories I would hear about it the next day, but she didn’t come to work today. There always has to be someone whether it be her or I there as a director at ALL times, in case anything goes wrong or licensing comes to check in, etc. There was no way I could leave school because I had to turn in a paper in one class, and then I had a review for a midterm in another class. She couldn’t come to work because her son had broken his leg, and she spent the night until around 3am in the emergency room with him. I completely understand and I feel horrible, but I guess there’s a business side of me that says, “I don’t care, get your butt to work!”, and then I feel like such a horrible person. It’s just very stressful but I guess that’s what comes along with running a business. Thank Goodness my mother is flying back tomorrow, and although she will be sleeping for the next week due to her jet lag, at least I’ll have someone to complain to.

Another great reason I’m so excited my mom is coming back, is because my brother is currently planning his last minute, but really not so last minute wedding that’s on Thanksgiving weekend. They’ve had it “planned” for about 8 months but are just now deciding to start doing everything, the booked the venue a couple weeks ago, and my sister in law ordered her dress, that’s really about all they’ve done. My mom and I are a little annoyed at how they seem to not want to do anything for their own wedding, they just sit around and wait for my mother and I to step in. We actually planned their engagement party, which was HUGE, and we did ALL the work. Literally it was my mother and I and 2 coworkers who planned the entire party for around 500 people, and we had less than a month to plan everything because it was a really quick engagement. Although both myself and my mother love planning parties, it’s exhausting and just adds a lot more stress, which at this point I’m not sure either of us can handle. I don’t think I have ever in my life been as stressed out as the last two months, and I’m really hoping things get better because I can feel my veins bursting! I would like to be able to eat and sleep again, and not have a constant headache. Yay for tomorrow, momma to the rescue!!! I hope…

Since i previously forgot, here is my vocab word that i have been completely been forgetting about! Hahah, the vocab word i choose is; Caligulan (adjective) which means "extreme in cruelty”. To use the word in a sentence, my mother has been Caligulan by leaving me to run her business for 3 months.

So tired:[

So it’s like 9:30pm, on Thursday and I need to write my blog. Mind you, I have been living off about 3 maybe 4 hours of sleep a night for the past week and a half, this might not all come out right. I am completely exhausted! I haven’t been sleeping as I mentioned earlier because I have an insane amount of homework, I’m extremely stressed out at work, and I have to deal with my crazy family. This is what my days usually look like, at least for the past two weeks. I wake up at 5:30 am, which is SO early, it’s ridiculous. I am definitely NOT a morning person, at all. I go to work around 6:10-6:15, and have to deal with screaming, whining kids under the ages of 5, who just have way to much energy for that time of day. I leave work around 8:15 to get to school. I have class M-TH from 9-11:45, I usually then head off too the gym until 1:30, and then if I have time I run home to take a shower. If not I have to be at work by 2pm, sometimes super sweaty and nasty. I work until 6pm and then have to come home and cook dinner for my father and cousin, two men who are probably the pickiest eaters in the universe. By the time I cook, we eat, I clean everything up its already around 9 pm. Then I get to start doing my homework, so usually I’m not done until around 1or 2 am because it takes me forever to read. At this point I’m so exhausted that half the things I read, I do not comprehend anyways so really it’s a little useless.
My days are definitely long, and there are so many times I wish I could just leave it all and go home and curl up in my bed and sleep for a good 24 hours. That would really just be my dream come true, but when I think about it logically, I know that that would never happen, so I need to stop getting my hopes up. Truthfully, I can’t imagine myself not doing anything all day long, like my 18 year old cousin who wakes up at 1pm everyday, eats, watches TV, plays video games, takes a nap, and then eats again and then does some more of nothing, and then goes to bed. As amazing as it kind of sounds, I just wouldn’t be able to go from all of this, to that. I know I may complain a lot about how tired I am, and how stressed I am, but in the end, that’s life, right?
I think this was the perfect way for me to vent all my feeling that I’ve been keeping inside. Usually I talk to my mom on a daily basis and we both sit there for hours complaining to each other, and I never knew how much it really helped me until my mom left to Egypt to visit her mom in July, and I’ve been lost ever since. Any time I call her of course she’s busy, so really our conversations either revolve around the daycare, which is her business that I’m currently running, or asking about my brother’s upcoming wedding and what kind of flowers we decided on. She’s finally coming back on Thursday, which I can’t even wait for. So excited to have someone to complain to again! Woohoo!

Beyond Chaos

Blog Week 3
Absolute Chaos
These last couple weeks at work have been absolute chaos, maybe worse. My mother owns a childcare center, but is currently on vacation in Egypt (as she has been for the last 2 months), so I’ve been running it while she’s gone. I’m a teacher there usually, but dealing with bills and annoying people who don’t want to work takes it to a while other level. My mom for some reason thinks its perfectly fine to just up and leave for a few months, leaving me in charge while I also go to school full time and take care of the house, which includes cooking every night and cleaning because my father is Arab and is old school. I really love working with kids, and luckily we are licensed for 44 children, but thank god I have 7-9 other staff usually working. These past few weeks however, we were already looking for two new teachers for two of our classrooms because we just enrolled about 6 new kids. Then our Pre- K teacher, who has only been working for two months, just didn’t show up one day. We panicked, made it through that day to find out she has preeclampsia(high blood pressure) and is pregnant so she probably will not be returning for a few months. Ms. Martha, our infant room teacher, that had just marked the probation period a week ago, has now discovered that she has arthritis and has been sending us doctor’s notes saying she can no longer work. On top of all this, we are under probation from licensing for another mistake, so if licensing comes and we aren’t fully staffed with the correct ration of students to teachers, they could very easily shut us down. Therefore this may have easily been the most stressful week of my “career”.
On top of this, I’m trying to deal with the stress of figuring out my graduation requirements, figuring out when I am supposed to find time to study for the GRE, and actually apply to take it, stressing over all the work I have to do for my classes, figuring out time do even do that work, stressing over planning two bridal showers and helping plan my brother’s wedding, AND dealing with my father and his demands for the house. I am definitely the kind of person who becomes stressed over the slightest things, so at this point my stress level is at a 100, I can’t sleep, I have a constant migraine, and anytime I complain to my mom, she replies, “it’s okay honey, just don’t stress yourself out”…really? Thanks mom!
There really are just not enough hours in a day. For the past couple weeks, I’ve been working at 6:15 am, the going to school, gym if there’s time because I have 3 months to get in shape for my brothers wedding, then I go back to work until 6 pm, come home and cook and clean and by that time all I really want to do is sleep, but I usually am awake until about 1-2am doing homework. Sleep has not been much of an option lately, and it’s beginning to really take a toll on me. I can tell that I’m crankier, have less patience, have crazy mood swings, and get so emotional over everything. I sound like a 13 year old going through the beginning stages of puberty, it’s just fabulous.
All I pray is that all of “this” be settled soon. I hope we hire 3 new fabulous teachers, who aren’t pregnant, disabled, or lazy. I hope that everyone gets their “stuff” and really starts to work hard. I would like to have time to just sleep, study for my GRE’s, and just “relax” a little. I really can’t wait until December, when I should be going to Egypt for a month for my best friends wedding and to visit friends and family I haven’t seen in almost 3 years. This will be the first actual vacation I’ve taken off work and school in 3 years, so I would say it’s much needed and deserved. So, dear next 3 months, PLEASE move along as quickly as possible. Thanks!

THE DAY HAS FINALLY COME.....

.....that my 28 year old brother is FINALLY moving out with his fiance. This last weekend, my brother and his fiancee finally moved out. My brother has been living with us for 28 years, and my soon to be sister-in-law has been living with us for about a month after her mother moved in with her boyfriend who my brother doesn't get along with, so she "had" to move into our house. I guess it's a good thing my mom and sister are not in the country right now( they're vacationing in Egypt), or else living in a 5 bedroom house with 7 people may have gotten a little crowded. I really do love my brother and my soon to be sister in law, but for the past year my brother has had such a short temper, that saying good-morning to him might set him off and have him yelling for an hour. I understand he's stressed out because he just started working at Apple after not being employed for about a year, and the requests for the wedding have been pouring in from my sister in law. They already had two prior parties, a huge engagement with close to 600 people and a smaller party at my sister in laws house for about 70 people. My sister in law insists on also having a large bridal shower, with around 150 of her girl friends and then the wedding which will be 300 people. That's a whole lot of parties! My brother and our family are also "supposed" to pay for it all because her parents both can't afford any of it.

So we've basically all been living in fear of having to avoid my brother and his princess of a wife because they are both overly dramatic, and again you really have to watch what you say. My brother insists that i do absolutely nothing around the house.  While mind you I go to school full-time, I run my mom's daycare business( which consists of the 44 kids we are licensed to have in our facility), take care of the house because my arab father expects me to cook everyday as well as clean, do all the chores, etc, and then take care of our 2 german Shepard puppies and our two cats. What upsets him is that I've asked my brother to walk our dogs every once in a while because i don't have a lot of time, which of course he can't because he doesn't want to be bothered by doing anything. His fiancee will also complain that i don't help her out with wedding planning, i don't buy any food that she likes, i don't cook anything she likes, i complain that i have to clean everything too much, and so on. It's really aggravating having to do stuff for people who are so unappreciative, and that's why i rally admire my mom. At least when my mom's here we are able to share in chores and stuff around the house, so it lessens the burden quite a bit.

Thankfully, they're out of the house for now! I forgot to add that, while i helped my brother and cousin move boxes and furniture up the 3 flights of stairs to my brother's new apartment, my sister in law sat on her bottom looking through her purse and talking on the phone. Again, of course no one could say a word. As long as they are finally out, right? Wrong...my brother came over for dinner today because his fiancee had to work late. Guess things don't change much, do they?

Eid Mubarak ya'll (Happy Eid for all of you non-arabic speakers=])

So Tuesday was the celebration of the Muslim holiday of Eid. It is based on the lunar calendar so it's often hard to tell what day we will celebrate until last minute, which is very difficult sometimes because then getting out of work and school is that much harder. Another reason why i don't like when it falls on a weekday. Thankfully, i was able to miss tuesday's class so i was able to attend the ritual prayer they conduct. It's literally about 5,000 people who gather together decked out in their newest and most fabulous new outfits, coming to socialize..i mean pray. It's actually really nice to see everyone from our community young and old come together and celebrate. It's a tradition that we follow every year, and although it may not seem like much it is a really special time for me.
The day went a little something like this. My dad woke us all up at the crack of dawn( which for me is 7am), even though we didn't have to be at the prayer unitl 10. He then spent an hour literally emptying out all the components of our fridge onto seperate plates, like cheese and bread and more cheese and turkey and olives, and of course he uses 30 different plates, that i later have to clean. Then he walks around the house yelling that all of us need to get up and come have breakfast and celebrate. We all tell him were up( when were really trying to get 10 more minutes of sleep) and he usually gets distracted, (by pulling out more things from the fridge) and then wakes us up again in about half an hour.
We then ate breakfast, which really none of us eat all that much because at 8 in the morning, when your dads in the BEST mood of his life, going back to sleep is just that much  more tempting. We then proceed to get ready, and then of course we have to take 500 family pictures. My mom and older sister are in Egypt for the next two months, so it's just my father, my brother and his wife, my cousin, and myself. We all have to take turns switching in and out of picture, until every combination of people is taken. Finally 20 minutes after we were supposed to leave we are all in the car on our way to the prayer. We get in and day hi to all the peolpe we really haven't seen the past year, make sure to check out all the hot boys(if there is any, this is only for me and my friends btw), and then listen to the "sermon" that is about 30 minutes long. After that we pray together again, and it's once again a mad house as all 5000 people are trying to leave. Everyone's kissing and hugging and laughing, and it's stuffy and crowded, but that is the beauty of Eid prayer. We hang out for the rest of the day with friends and family, usually consisting of a brunch together, and then everyone does their own thing. It kinda sucks that i have work and school tomorrow and wasn't able to really do anything that exciting because i had to go into work for a couple hours, but i guess now that we're all older, life and it's responsibilites seem to be knocking at our doors. Hope you all had an eventful tuesday as well!